Cupcakes For Breakfast

So I think we're all agreed. The top half of the Indian Wells draw is cancelled. We're just sending Rafa Nadal straight to the final, yesno?

Seriously, I'm not one of the people who sees conspiracy theories in draws, but if Rafa's draw was any cupcakier I would be eating it right now. It is freaking ridiculous. I've seen some fluke-y draws in my time, but this one is practically a work of art in its cupcakiness. And it's not like it necessarily started out that way, either - it's evolved into this high form of cupcake art. Give a monkey a pen and eventually it'll write Hamlet; give tennis players racquets and one day you'll be left with Rafa and some cakes.

Let's review. In fact, I've got a very special guest here on Tennis From Beyond The Baseline to review for you. Say hola to Rafa, guys!

...

Hello. Hola. I'm Rafa Nadal, and I'm ranked #1 in the world. I had a bit of a sad loss at the Australian Open, but I'm still ranked #1 and I'm all better from my injury, and I'm coming off a pretty excellent Davis Cup weekend. I'm pretty awesome. On my day, I can beat just about anyone. Actually, that is actually everyone, because I'm more than pretty awesome.

I get a bye in my first round, because, hello, awesome. And then in my second round, I get Rik de Voest. He's a qualifier. I know it can toughen people up, that qualifying draw, and I like my cupcakes all gooey and moist, so I decide to give him - oh, he retired. Oops. Who knew.

Meanwhile, while this is going on, the other seeds in my section are playing. Sorry, did I say playing? I meant losing. Out goes Monaco, out goes Baghdatis, out goes Tsonga, and the dude who beat me at the Australian Open, David Ferrer? Yeah, he's gone too. But it's all right. This cupcake still has some seeds in it. It's freaking multigrain. Simon! Almagro! Montanes! These dudes all have some mad skills, no?

Sorry, did you just ask what I'm ranked? #1, dude. And how many Slams do I have? That would be nine. How many other Slam winners are there in the entire top half of the draw? Well, Juan Martin del Potro won one, but he's over in the other side of the half. Murray's half. And Murray's been to three finals of Slams before - oh, Murray lost? To Donald Young?

You know I am a polite guy. I'm Rafa. But excuse me while I shriek WHAT THE F^&*?!

But you know, I am modest, and is basically impossible for me to win, no? These guys, they all play very good. Anyone is a danger. I'm playing Ryan Sweeting this round, and he got a whole FOUR GAMES off me at the Australian Open. In three sets. That is FOUR GAMES TOO MANY.

I am so disappointed. He got four games off me again, and this time in only TWO sets. My game must be slipping. Is basically impossible for me to win this cupcake-y half now, no? There are still some seeds left, remember - remember Montanes and Almagro and Simon?

WHAT DO YOU MEAN ONLY MONTANES IS LEFT WHAT IS THIS TOURNAMENT WHO IS BAKING THIS CUPCAKE FOR ME?!

But in the other side of this top half, it's still all going on. Murray might be gone, but Soderling is #4 now, and he's still there - oh. Hang on. So if I want to make the final, the highest seed I have to beat is... Verdasco?

Except no. Because he lost too. The highest ranked dude I could face now before the final is... drumroll... Sam Querrey. And is impossible for me to win that match, no? He's won three of eight matches this year and I'm only ranked #1. What more do you expect me to do?

Sorry guys, I have to say hasta manana now. I can smell cupcakes baking in the oven. And I have to play another qualifier soon.

...

...hi guys, Jodi's back now. And she would like to say WHAT THE EVERLOVING F^&* HAPPENED TO THE TOP HALF OF THE DRAW IN INDIAN WELLS?! The only dude that is even half a threat to Rafa now is Juan Martin del Potro and while he's pretty awesome, I don't think he's quite up to Rafa beating right now. We might as well pack up the top half now and send Rafa straight to the final.

And if I'm Rafa, I don't know how much I like this state of affairs. Because if I've been stuffing my face with cupcakes and then I get to the final and I get a big slice of Federer-or-Djokovic pie... I don't think that's going to sit too well, if you know what I mean. Cupcakes are many things - delicious, for example - but good preparation for a final? Not so much.

That Wimbledon Final II (Electric Boogaloo)

Here is one thing that I did not realise - the semi final match up of Federer and Roddick tomorrow will be the first time they have met since That Wimbledon Final. I could have sworn that they had played since, but since I can't put my finger on when it was nor find any record of such a match, I have to believe it.


It could have been a very significant match, if it took place a little closer to That Wimbledon Final. As it is, I don't think it will mean that much - certainly not to Federer, though he will obviously want to win very badly, because it is his home tournament and all. And as for Roddick? If he wins, it will be a big thing, but if he loses, it will be just another loss to the man that has beaten him nineteen times already. If it had been closer to That Wimbledon Final, then it would have been the cherry of torment on the top of his sundae of despair. But now... not so much.


It's been a good week for both men so far, and if Roddick loses now, it will still have been a good week. He had a good win over Querrey and an even better win over Nalbandian, and considering that he really hasn't had a great time of it since That Wimbledon Final, semis in Basel is a good result for him. It'll give him some valuable points towards a possible qualification for the world tour final (even more likely now that there is a bit of question mark over Rafa, who has just withdrawn from Bercy) and a bit of confidence. If he loses to Roger, well - there's no shame in that.


Roger, however, has been playing like a ninja all week and I imagine that he will really want to win this, particularly after he lost in the final to Djokovic last year. Though it won't crush him if he loses, it will be very disappointing for the tournament, and he won't want that. This is one of those rare occasions when he sort of needs the win more than his opponent.

So it's going to be an interesting match. I'm backing Roger (surprise, surprise) but I really don't think that the memory of That Wimbledon Final will help him too much. It's been too long and too much has happened and it's taken its toll on Roddick already. But you never know...

Bloody Coup

So much for bloodless.

We have to start by talking about Andy Roddick, because this is one of the worst losses he's taken in a while - not just in opponent but in demeanour. This is probably the most bad tempered match I have ever seen Andy play. He just had nothing going on, and he was berating himself stupid for it. It was painful to watch and to experience and does not bode well into the future. Anyone can take an early loss - but the manner in which he took this loss does not make me hopeful for his future.

Congrats to Janko Tipsarevic, though - great win! This really opens up the Djokovic quarter, and because I don't see Djokovic coming through, why not Tipsarevic to be surprise semi finalist? This quarter quite literally belongs to anyone.

You know who else is going nowhere fast? Oh HI, Tomas Berdych? Am I gleefully glad that you got booted out of the tournament like a whelp? Why... YES. I am really happy about that because I am never going to forgive you for Wimbledon EVER and I really, really love what Michael Llodra is bringing and maybe you don't deserve this but I am so, SO glad you are out, out, OUT!

Okay. Ahem. Back now.

There were a couple of other scares - Sam Querrey springs to mind - but otherwise the dudes survived okay. Oh, except for Ljubicic! This is a big win for Ryan Harrison. I wouldn't go tipping him for future glory or anything, but it has to be heartening.

Now, over to the ladies. Vika, Vika, Vika. I don't even like you and I am TOTALLY worried about you. I am glad that it wasn't heat-related because that would have been seriously worrying, but could you try not to give yourself a concussion when I've picked you to make the final? That would be greatly appreciated.

But I don't think this says anything about my picking abilities. How was I supposed to anticipate a concussion?

Oh, and we have to talk about Ana Ivanovic. What is this whole winning-two-matches-in-a-row-in-a-convincing-fashion thing? This is not dreamt of in my philosophy!

Strawberry Fields Forever

Okay, now I really am running out of pink-themed phrases. I might have to let it go now.

I don't think anyone was really expecting Federer to win this match, but I know he hoped he would. However, losing here is not the end of the world. He has the #2 ranking back for a week, and I don't think this will have damaged his confidence against Murray in the best-of-5 arena at all. And although he's played some really good stuff this week, he's also played some truly, truly dreadful tennis. And he still made the final. And that says something.

The emphasis is more here for Murray. He described this as one of the best weeks of his life, and while I don't want to call it a turning point for him, he did win his first title of the year and he did beat Nalbandian, Nadal and Federer en route, who arguably make up the other three of the top four US Open contenders. (Djokovic = arguable, in my book.)

And so what he gets here is confidence. What he gets here is momentum. And now the question is - what is he going to do with it?

A tiny part of me is glad Federer didn't play so well this week because I don't want him to peak too early. I don't want to say Murray is in danger of this - he doesn't have too many fitness issues - but he should just make sure he doesn't psychologically peak too early. Ask Sam Querrey - it's one thing to win the US Open series, quite another to win the US Open.

But this can be nothing but good for Murray. I feel like it's a pretty positive outcome for Federer as well. And I think we'll get a much clearer indication of where everyone stands when we move into Cincinatti next week... please, Roger, keep wearing that shirt. Strawberry fields forever. (Sorry. It had to be done.)

Bobbing To The Surface

A name that is popping up with increasing regularity, I am finding, is Kevin Anderson. Has anyone else noticed this? This boy from South Africa is still under the radar, but he's a little less under, if that makes any sense.

The first time I encountered Anderson - encounters, she says, like she's actually met the guy - was in Miami a couple of years ago, where he put out Djokovic in a real stunner. He then proceeded to do pretty much fat nothing for a couple of years, but if someone is going to put a top guy, even if nothing ends up coming of it, you know there is some serious talent going on there.

He's playing Querrey as we speak, and they've split sets. Now, we must remember that Querrey won the US Open series last year, so this is no mean feat. I couldn't tell you exactly where, but I know I've seen his name popping up a lot this year. Has anyone else noticed this? Or am I just having flashbacks? Or is it because he's South African and there was that whole World Cup thing?

Anyways.

A name that is definitely NOT popping up is Simone Bolelli. Well, I suppose it is popping up, but not in a good way. It's in the losing-in-the-first-round way. And if that keeps happening, well... soon it will be in the qualifying way.

Breaking Glass, Breaking the Draw Open

What is it with American tennis players and freak glass related injuries? First Sam Querrey goes through a coffee table and needs some stupid amount of stitches, and now Serena is out for a good few months after treading on broken glass on a restaurant.

I can't quite understand how that happened, but I do know that there must be one terrified restaurant owner out there quivering in their boots anticipating the wrath of Serena.

Is this just bad luck for Serena? Or is it the universe's way of ensuring she doesn't win three Slams this year and make the rest of the women in the field look a little bit ridiculous?

I mean, if Serena says she'll be ready for the US Open, I believe her. But coming in on no matches is definitely not the bestest prep ever. And it's a little bit sad that even though she'll be coming in matchless and to the scene of her greatest ever humiliation, she's still the favourite.

So if Serena doesn't win in New York, who is going to step up to the plate? That is the question now. Will it be Kim Clijsters in a fairy tale repeat? Or will someone else make a dash on it? Given Serena's injury, basically any winner is going to be a surprise winner. That broken glass just broke the draw wiiiiiiiide open. It's going to be an interesting US Open indeed.

The Greatest Ever

It's official. I don't think there is any room for argument on this one.

Dustin Brown is the Greatest of All Time when it comes to hair in tennis.

Seriously, that dude has AWESOME HAIR.

He beat Sam Querrey in Newport today, which raised a couple of questions - 1) Who is this Dustin Brown fellow anyway and 2) What the hell is Sam Querrey doing playing in Newport?

I'm all for more grasscourt tennis, but dude, Wimbledon is over. If you're trying to set yourself up as some kind of uber tennis player, you need to learn the rules - don't play on a surface when there's no point in playing on this surface. And if you do, don't go losing to Dustin Brown - even if his hair is awesome.

This is the grass version of those clay tournaments that exist for no reason. I suppose they can't exactly whack it in the existing grass season due to the fact that no one in their right mind is going to go from Paris to Newport to London, but it just seems like a pretty pointless tournament.

And now I don't care about it at all because my man Nico Mahut is out. But what I do care about is Dustin Brown's hair. Which is rad.

Wimbledon 2010 - The Gents

We did the ladies yesterday, time for the gents. Wimbledon T-minus one day!

Roger's quarter: I don't think my pick in this quarter is going to be exactly revolutionary. Unlike Roland Garros, Roger has what I would call a better draw than his buddy Rafa. He opens up against Alejandro 'don't say my name' Falla, which you'd think would be not too bad. And the other big seed in this quarter, Davydenko, is fresh off injury and hasn't really been right since the whole beatdown at the Australian Open incident.

So yeah, surprises.

There are some interesting lurkers in this section, however. Andrey Golubev is going to be the one I keep my eye on, but I'm going to track the progress of Marsel Ilhan, Dustin Brown and Carsten Ball carefully. They're not exactly top ten material yet, but they're interesting guys with upset potential.

Winner: Roger. I am SUCH a revolutionary.
If not him, then: Heaven forbid such a thing occur. But I'm going to keep it Swiss and say Stan Wawrinka. I like his grass court game.
Dark horse: See note re heaven forbid. But I'm going to go with Berdych or, if the apocalypse happens to occur, Schuettler.
First round matches to watch: Tursunov/Schuettler, Luczak/Robredo, Brown/Melzer and Berdych/Golubev.

Novak's quarter: I'm going to be equally revolutionary and not pick Djokovic in this quarter, because please, what has he done these days? Wimbledon seems to bring out something special in Roddick, and much as I am not keen on the idea of a Roger/Andy semi, what with Soderling's retribution in Roland Garros, I can definitely see it happening.

I suppose Hewitt might be another contender in this quarter, but I am really not on that bandwagon and frankly don't see it happening - not over best of five. The biggest threats otherwise, in my opinion, are Marin Cilic and Philipp Kohlschreiber. They haven't done much of much lately, but they're both solid guys who could just solid their ways into the semis, should everyone crumble around them.

Also keep an eye on Yen-hsun Lu. I like him on grass.

Winner: Roddick. What a daring gamble, Jodi!
If not him, then: I'm going to say Cilic. I like him on grass.
Dark horses: Kohlschreiber and (sigh) Hewitt. Emphatically NOT Bernard Tomic. I don't think his style is especially well suited to grass.
First round matches to watch: Schwank/Korolev, Fish/Tomic and Monfils/Mayer.

Muzz's quarter:I can't figure out if it's more revolutionary to pick for or against Muzz in this quarter. I don't like the way he's playing, nor do I think he will react especially well to the British pressure (particularly if the English team goes out in the World Cup) but his quarter of the draw is really not that tough. If this were Roland Garros, he'd have cause to be scared, but there's not huge stacks of grass court prowess going on in this section.

That said, I wouldn't want to face Sam Querrey's serve on grass if I were a pro tennis player. No sirree.

I suppose you never know what Jo Tsonga can pull either, but he's injured (yesno?) Anyway, I picked him to make the semis in Paris and the boy let me down. Same with Ferrero - have never really seen him play on grass, but can't see it suiting him especially well.

Winner: Muzz. For lack of a better option.
If not him, then: Sam Querrey. See notes re serve.
Dark horses: Watch that tumbleweed going by. Oh, all right, I'll pick Verdasco and Tsonga. And Marco Chiudinelli, just for funsies.
First round matches to watch: Benneteau/Vliegen, Tsonga/Kendrick and Querrey/Stakhovsky.

Rafa's quarter: Now this is not a nice quarter for Rafa. The current question mark over Gulbis (is he in? is he out?) might lessen his angst a little, but the fact remains that he has a rocky road to the final... and I'm a little worried about how his body's holding up. Boy's played a LOT of tennis lately (even if he was winning all his matches in straights).

So I really am going to be revolutionary. I'm not picking Rafa. Faint now. Off you go.

I'm giving my vote to Soderling. I think he has the drive to prove himself outside Roland Garros, and you can bet that if he met Rafa in the quarters, he would want to give him what-for in recompense for the finals in Paris. I haven't seen a great deal of him on grass, but I think he could definitely keep the ball low on Rafa, and that would help his cause a lot.

Also, watch out for John Isner. That's all I'm saying.

Winner: Robin Soderling. He wants it.
If not him, then: Rafa. I'm not THAT revolutionary.
Dark horses: John 'I could kill you with my serve' Isner. Youzhny could also be a spoiler and Baghdatis has been to the semis here before.
First round matches to watch: Ferrer/Kiefer, Youzhny/Sela and Nadal/Nishikori.

That leaves us with the following semi finalists:

FedEx vs Andy R
Andy M vs The Yoker

I think either of these matches could go either way. But if someone had a gun to my head and forced me to choose, I would pick the following final:

FedEx vs Andy M

I'm as surprised as you are. I certainly didn't expect myself to be tipping Muzz for the final. And here I find myself doing it. That said, Soderling is totally going to take him to five. And if it does end up that Nadal makes the semis, he will make Muzz his bitch. But the winner of this hypothetical final is...

FedEx.

Told you I was a revolutionary.

What are your thoughts?

The C Word

What is this I am eating? Why yes, it is my words, accompanied by a large slice of humble pie. I suppose that will teach me to write off Lleyton Hewitt.

But considering he was on a fifteen match losing streak to Federer, what was I supposed to do?

I think the fans will be more worried about this loss than Federer himself, and that is something which actually worries me a little. I don't want to mention the dread word 'complacency', but I'm beginning to think it might be heading in that direction. Two of his big streaks have just been broken - the semis and then the wins at Halle. I don't think either has worried him too much and I kind of wish they worried him more.

But I cannot be greedy. The dude has sixteen Slams, after all. If that's not going to make you complacent, what is?

Big props to Lleyton Hewitt, though. I had totally written him off and he proved me wrong. I still hesitate to make him a big chance for Wimbledon, but if the draw falls right for him, he could make the semis. Best of five will be, however, harder for him, I think, with his hips. But the results this week show that there is a small degree of openness to this year's Wimbledon which maybe hasn't been there in the past.

Oh, and Querrey beat Fish. I, um, don't really care that much, but good on Sam. We ain't on clay no more.

Measure of Wimbledon

So I might have to eat humble pie re Lleyton Hewitt, given that he is in the final of Halle... but I'm still not very inclined to change my mind. I don't want to do any jinxing by saying this, but I give him exactly no chance to beat Federer, and unless he can play with the big boys on the small stage, he's not going to be able to play with them at the big stage.

Here is hoping I don't have to eat my words tomorrow. I don't think they'd be very tasty.

Meanwhile, with that top heavy field in Queen's, who thought that we'd be seeing a Fish vs Querrey final? I certainly wouldn't have picked it, that's for sure. Though this being said, this could be a real sign of things to come. We've got a very open women's game at the moment - I will be very interested to see what happens with the boys at Wimbledon.

Federer is, of course, solid, but there are big fat question marks over the rest of the fabulous four. Murray and Djokovic are not not NOT in form and I am worried about Rafa's injuries. And Queen's has showed us that it's a while down the list before anyone is making a real showing - Querrey is the seventh seed, Fish unseeded.

So are we going to have a surprise finalist at Wimbledon? Will Queen's be the measure of the tournament?

Dinara Gets Krummed

I don't think there's a whole lot more that can be said about Day 3 other than Dinara, Dinara, Dinara. What a compellingly disappointing performance. I don't know whether the break up with Zeljko has been a good thing or not, but Gaston Etlis needs to get Dinara to a sports psych, stat. I've seen a lot of tennis matches in my time - I've seen your Grosjeans and your Gasquets - and that is one of the single chokiest performances I have ever seen.


The winners: Well, Kimiko Date Krumm, obviously. When you're just about forty and playing on one leg and you beat a former world #1, you've got a little sumthin' sumthin' going on.


Other women that I thought were major winners were Maria Sharapova, who has continued her good form from Strasbourg; Justine (obviously); Anastasia Rodionova, who won her first ever Slam match, and Jarmila Groth ('cause she's Australian). However, I thought the winniest winner among the women yesterday was probably Yanina Wickmayer. She's in that year-after-the-breakthrough phase, but I think people ought to watch out for Yanina. She's got quite a nice draw and she could potentially go a long way.


Over in the boys, I thought David Ferrer and Lleyton Hewitt were probably the best performers over all. (Note: I am judging Rafa by a completely different standard. He was obviously the best player yesterday, but by his own admission, it was not his bestest match ever, even though he won comfortably.)


The losers: Dinara Safina. Obviously. She's going to plummet down the rankings Ivanovic-style here, and it's not going to be pretty. A change is clearly what she needs and she has that in the form of Gaston Etlis - I just hope it begins to pay dividends for her. And that she can fix that mess of a serve. It's crazy.


For the dudes, though we lost players like Juan Monaco and Eduardo Schwank, who are good dirtballers, disappointment of the day was clearly Sam Querrey. He really shouldn't be losing to Ginepri, and he knows it - he left Paris in a fit of pique, leaving his doubles partner in the lurch. And he quit Twitter. Not really impressed with Samurai right now.


The disappointments: I think Rafa was a little disappointed in himself, but it would be totally unfair to place him in this category, so I won't.


I do have to put Carla Suarez Navarro here, because I had hoped for a lot from her. I know she's injured so it isn't her fault, but it is disappointing. She's a lovely clay player with a beautiful backhand. Now she and Martinez Sanchez are both out, I think only Medina Garrigues is flying the flag for the Spanish ladies.


Eduardo Schwank was also disappointing. He's got some moves on clay and he went out to a dude I have never heard of (Blaz Kavcic), retiring in the fourth set when down two sets to one. Didn't see the match so I couldn't even tell you what his injury was, but this is a disappointing result for him.


The-scraped-in-by-skin-of-teeth: Why, hello, Andy Roddick. He looked very nonchalant in his five set win over Jarkko Nieminen and he came perilously close to being bundled out. He hasn't played a match on red clay all season so I'm not surprised he's rusty - and let's face it, Roland Garros is not the tournament closest to his heart. That one is coming up in a few weeks.


Horacio Zeballos, also. He only just made it through 8-6 in the fifth over some dude I have never heard of.


One to watch: Gianni Mina. He may have been routed by the raging bull yesterday, but Mina's going to grow up into something a bit cool. I would not be surprised if he surpasses his doppelganger Gael Monfils...

Roman Holiday

Wow - Barcelona finished without me even noticing. I got all caught up in Fed Cup and then suddenly Rome's started and that whole week is gone.

A little late, but awesome work, Nando Verdasco. I haven't been reeeeeeeally convinced by Nando for a while now, but to back up a final in Monte Carlo (where, admittedly, he got crushed, but them's the haps when you play Rafa, I guess) with a win in Barcelona is pretty much epic. Didn't see the match and so thus can't comment, but Nando's making a push to be in those claycourt contenders this year. And good on him for it.

Now, we're all caught up. Over to Rome.

I'd have to say the award for biggest win of the day has to go to Ernests Gulbis. Yes, I know I'm biased, considering I've been clinging to the Gulbis train for a while now, but if he wins his next match I'm going to be cursing his name (he's playing Federer) and so I have to laud him now. Marcos Baghdatis is a tough, tough opponent, even if his ranking doesn't necessarily reflect this, and Gulbis smashed him like a guitar. I'm going to be very interested to see how Ernie does on clay - his breakthrough, we must remember, came at Roland Garros 2008...

Biggest loss of the day is a toss up between Sam Querrey and Juan Carlos Ferrero, but I'm going to have to go with the Mosquito on this one. A qualifier? Seriously, JC? I know you can do so much better than this...

...but perhaps, as it often happens on clay, this will be a blessing in disguise. Maybe JC will get some rest and be super fresh when he hits the home courts in Madrid...

JI's Last Hurrah

Well, thank God Wayne Odesnik didn't make it to the Houston final, that's all I can say. Good on Sam Querrey for winning that one.

But I feel like he might have expended a little too much righteous energy in that match, because Juan Ignacio Chela is not really someone he should be losing to. Querrey is, what, 37 in the world? And sure, I realise and respect that he is not a dirtballer and Chela is (at least, more so) but Querrey really should be making mincemeat of JI. Because, let's face it, everyone else is.

I was very surprised to see Chela on the winner's podium here, not just because he beat Querrey, but because he beat, well, everyone else. I think everyone's attention has been focused squarely on Odesnik here, so his run to the final - and, indeed, the title - hasn't been the focus of much of anything. But I'd written Chela off as a huge has been. He's done nothing of note for at least two or three years.

But now, a title. Huh.

I think this is a fluke rather than some kind of epic return to form from Chela - I still think he's going to be remembered as that dude that had that spat with Lleyton Hewitt that time moreso than as JI the fantastic player. This is a huge result for him, make no mistake. But whether or not it means anything in the greater scheme of things? I don't think it's anything more than a last hurrah.

Still A Dope

So if Wayne Odesnik wins in Houston, it's going to be the most awkward trophy ceremony ever.

Actually, you know what? If he does win, I don't think they should even have a trophy ceremony. They shouldn't give him a trophy and they shouldn't give him prize money, because it's all going to be taken away anyway. Because the dude f*cking cheated and if he thinks anything different is going to be proven he has got another think coming.

You know that things are bad for a sportsman when sportsmen from the same country are actively baying for their blood. Sport is quite parochial, traditionally - even tennis, which is hardly a team sport. But Andy Roddick and Sam Querrey, to name a couple, want Odesnik gone. Roddick thinks he should be gone from tennis, bam. Querrey refuses to lose to him.

And fair enough, Sam. You shouldn't even have to play this dude. And even the current doping rules are allowing him to play, and the ITF hasn't slammed down the banhammer like happened in the infamous Belgian case a while back, Odesnik should not be playing. He admitted to possessing HGH and that, by itself, is going to be a two year ban. And no one deserves to have to play - and, as has happened so far in Houston - lose to a cheater.

I bet one Jerzy Janowicz is quite pissed off right now... and I bet he, and pretty much everyone in the sport of tennis at the moment, is identifying as one of Sam Querrey's Samurai for the next match.

Andy Roddick's Bridesmaids

You know who I haven't been that impressed with lately? Sam Querrey. You know who I have been impressed with? John Isner. So you can imagine my surprise when the Memphis final turned out the way it is.

Since James Blake slid down the rankings like melting butter, the search has been on for the next American wunderkind. Mardy Fish was a little old for the job, and Sam Querrey seemed to be the prime candidate. He had a few seriously quality months last year where he scored some awesome wins. And then he sat on that glass coffee table and things started not going so well.

Enter Isner. He'd been around for a while, but then he started, you know, being all good. I think his real big break probably came in the US Open last year when he beat Andy Roddick in the third round, but Big John had been coming hard for a while. Both he and Querrey play Karlovician tennis - however, I would argue, that John is more Ivo than Ivo. Ivo may be taller, but John at the net...

I think the reason I am so surprised at this result coming out of Memphis is that Querrey and Isner have similar games - the Dr Ivo style of tennis, based around a monstrous serve. However, Querrey seemed to me to be declining and Isner to be rising, and not just because Querrey fell through that coffee table. It seems to me - and, despite this result, it still does - that Isner and Querrey play the same style, only Isner is better at it.

It happens, I suppose. And Isner did have the match on his racquet in that second set tiebreak. There was some real mental toughness involved in this match - as there always is, I suppose, when you have a match that is centred around tiebreakers. I was still surprised, however... and I'll be interested to see how this rivalry plays out in the future. Because it seems to me that Isner, not Querrey, is going to be Andy Roddick's bridesmaid in the long term.

Bandy Voodoo

Okay, so Gulbis didn't win his semi final - he got outclubbed by Sam Querrey - but this is still a very positive result for him in Memphis. Much more positive than anything he's done in the last eighteen months or so, at any rate. Hopefully it was not a big-arse fluke, because I really do not want to return to the kingdom of the eternal first round loss again, no sirree. It's been lonely on the Ernie bandwagon on all my onesies, and I do not wish for the train to turn back into the tunnel now I think I have seen the light at the end of it.

Yeah. That's right. I rock that train metaphor.

There have been other players playing this week apart from Ernie, though my blog would seem to belie it. One such of these was David Nalbandian. Yes, I know I am a few days behind here, but I have to ask the question -who exactly is it that has the Bandy voodoo doll? Because this level of injury is SO not normal.

I never really was Bandy's biggest fan, but you have to feel sorry for the guy. He has more injury problems than Rafael Nadal's knees. And he totally never used to be like this either - I can't remember any major, major injuries in his career before this whole year-off debacle. Maybe there was a wrist thing or something one time, but I never had him up there on my Captain Injury Prone list, if you know what I mean.

But now it's all gone wrong for him.

That said, he did have some positive results. He managed to get a win or two before the person with the voodoo doll realised and struck him down again. Hopefully he can keep it coming - though I have to say that if you're on the injury comeback trail, clay is probably not the surface you want to be on. Not even that's gone right for him, poor dude.

Get better, Bandy. And get someone to find that voodoo doll and deactivate it. Or whatever.

New Haven Intrigue

Probably I should be looking at the US Open draws and making my predictions and stuff - it's about that time of pre-tournament fervour - but I have to say that I'm just the tiniest bit intrigued by New Haven this week. It's been throwing up some results which are not... not unusual, but interesting.

Sam Querrey is in the final. We all know how I've ranted and raved about Querrey winning the US Open series, and I still think it's a bit strange that he managed to win it, but still - his achievements this summer have been some of the best of his career. Two finals - possibly two titles - and all with a game that I personally don't think is the best game EVAH, on account of it seeming a little one-dimensional. But Querrey's been making the best of what he's got, and it's been working for him. Good on him.

And then the other finalist is Fernando Verdasco, of whom we all expected such massive things after that spectacular run he had at the Australian Open, and who didn't not deliver, but who didn't exactly deliver either. He had a few injury woes, I understand, but people (including me) kept picking him to pull upsets, and he didn't really... well, do that.

It's not that he's been playing badly - it's just we haven't seen that fire that got him through Davis Cup and the Aussie Open. He hasn't been burning up the court - and I, for one, would like to see him back ablaze, because he really is something special when he's on. His Davis Cup and Australian Open results would suggest that hard courts are his best surface - I would like to see that hold true in New York and see him make another good run. Maybe not all the way to the semis like last time, but a good, solid deep run.

These two are names that have to be considered going into the US Open - I wouldn't call them real title chances, but these are the guys that can go deep and upset some of the big names if given half a chance. I'll be interested to see how New Haven pans out - because going into the US Open with a win under your belt has to be a pretty sweet feeling!


Today's Results

Pilot Pen Tennis (New Haven)

Men's Draw

Fernando Verdasco def. Igor Andreev, 7-6 (7-4) 7-6 (7-5)
Sam Querrey def. Jose Acasuso, 6-3 6-4


Women's Draw

Caroline Wozniacki def. Elena Vesnina, 6-2 6-4

The History Which Does Not Repeat Itself

Querrey beat Davydenko in New Haven. Okay, so maybe this is a leetle better in terms of him winning the US Open series - semis in New Haven plus that title he won earlier in I don't remember where is lots of yummy, tasty points.

Still not enough to catch up to the Murrays and Federers, though, in my humble opinion. It sounds like quantity, not quality, is the name of the game. There must be more points weighted at the 250 level than I had thought. But still, nevertheless, it's a big achievement, so well done Sam.

One question I asked at the beginning of the US season was who was going to be this year's Juan Martin del Potro - and, oh yes, I was determined there was going to be one, because how could there not? Turned out every single prediction I made was wrong, because there really wasn't one. No one guy really burned up the pre-US Open courts this summer in a noticeable way. In fact, the closest you'd probably come would be Querrey, and... um, no. If a guy can win the US Open series without me even noticing, I don't think that counts as the Incredible Hot Streak of Top Ten Makeage like Juan M's was.

So I guess all I've proved with all my theorising is that tennis is completely unpredictable. History doesn't always repeat itself and trends do not always reappear. Like this year's Australian Open - where was this year's Marcos? One of my favourite things around January is to pick the random who will reach the final... who did we get this year? Roger and Rafa.

I'm sure there's a lesson to be learned in there somewhere... but hell, as if I'm going to stop making up my little theories? What would I write about then? 'I don't understannnnnnnnd the rankings system!' 'I love Roger!' 'Novak sucks!'

...yeah, that'd get dull after a while.


Today's Results

Pilot Pen Tennis (New Haven)

Men's Tennis

Fernando Verdasco def. Jurgen Melzer, 6-3 6-1
Sam Querrey def. Nikolay Davydenko, 6-3 3-6 6-4
Igor Andreev def. Leonardo Mayer, 6-4 6-7 (4-7) 6-3


Women's Tennis

Elena Vesnina def. Anna Chakvetadze, 6-1 7-5
Flavia Pennetta def. Magdalena Rybarikova, 6-2 6-2
Caroline Wozniacki def. Virginie Razzano, 6-4 6-3

Questioning Querrey

Um, so Sam Querrey won the US Open Series.

What?

When did that happen?

I know he did well early on and won a title and what-not, but it was one measly title! What about guys like Federer and Murray, who went deep into Masters events and split them? Actually, I would have sworn it would be Murray - how, exactly, does what Querrey has done trump winning Montreal and following it with semis in Cincinatti?

This is weird. I've always remembered the US Open series winners as... well, sensible. You know, people that should be winning stuff. Nothing against Sam Querrey - he's obviously had a great summer, picking up that title and all - but he's not exactly a worldbeater. I wouldn't rank him among my big time picks for the US Open, let's put it that way. (Watch him go and pull a Marcos now I've said that. Just watch.)

Long and the short of the matter is that I don't understand how Querrey won this. I'm not exactly a rankings/maths whiz, as readers of this blog will know by my frequent 'I don't understannnnnnnnd!' rants, but this one just seems a little... weird.


Today's Results

Pilot Pen Tennis (New Haven)

Men's Draw

Sam Querrey def. Bjorn Phau, 7-5 6-3
Igor Andreev def. Frederico Gil, 6-4 6-4
Jurgen Melzer def. Victor Hanescu, 7-6 (7-5) 4-6 6-1
Leonardo Mayer def. Simone Bolelli, 6-2 6-4
Jose Acasuso def. Igor Kunitsyn, 3-6 7-6 (7-3) 6-3
Nikolay Davydenko def. Fabrice Santoro, 7-5 6-3


Women's Draw

Svetlana Kuznetsova def. Yanina Wickmayer, 6-4 5-7 7-6 (7-2)
Caroline Wozniacki def. Anastasia Pavlyuchenkova, 6-1 6-4
Flavia Pennetta def. Iveta Benesova, 7-6 (7-1) 6-4
Virginie Razzano def. Agnieszka Radwanska, 3-6 6-4 retired
Elena Vesnina def. Samantha Stosur, 3-6 6-4 6-4

Ball Bounced

I don't think anyone's surprised that Ball got bounced by Querrey - it had to happen sooner or later. The possibility of Carsten Ball being in an ATP final is possible in this universe, but him actually winning would catapult us into a new one where fish rode bicycles and stuff.

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That said, kudos to Carsten for taking up those miniscule odds to make the final and for playing Querrey tight. I've liked a lot of what I've seen off the Querrey racquet lately - as I'll discuss in a moment - and Ball, little Carsten Ball of whom no one has really heard, took him to three sets. Sure, the third set was a bit of a blow out, but Carsten hung tough there for quite some time. I don't think he's ever going to be a worldbeater, but onya Carsten.

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On to Querrey. Now, I used to think he was spectacularly overrated - a sort of middle ground between Karlovic and Guccione. I'm still no Samurai, but you have to have kudos for what he's brought of late... and for finally winning a final, even if it was against Carsten Ball. He says he thinks he can win the US Open... I think that might be optimistic, mate. But there's no reason he can't pull a Juan and make quarters or so before going out to a Murray or a Djokovic or, hell, a del Potro. Actually, depending on where he is in the draw, I'm calling it now. Quarters for Sam Querrey... unless he's in the Federer quarter. Or possibly the Nadal quarter, depending on the state of Rafa's knees.

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And Marion Bartoli, eh? What was she doing winning Stanford when there were the Williams sisters there? And Demetieva and other folks that are, like, all good and stuff? I do not understand...

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...more on our final weekend winner, Nikolay Davydenko, tomorrow... unless you count the winner of Istanbul, but I know nothing about her, so no counting will be done.

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Today's Results

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LA Tennis Open (Los Angeles)

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Sam Querrey def. Carsten Ball, 6-4 3-6 6-1

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Legg Mason Tennis Classic (Washington)

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Wayne Odesnik def. Paul Capdeville, 4-6 6-2 6-4

Ernests Gulbis def. Kevin Kim, 7-5 3-6 6-3

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LA Women's Tennis Championships (Los Angeles)

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Lucie Safarova def. Kaia Kanepi, 6-3 7-6 (7-4)

Alisa Kleybanova def. Alla Kudryavtseva, 6-1 6-3

Ai Sugiyama def. Carly Gullickson, 6-3 6-1

Vania King def. Sybille Bammer, 6-3 6-2